CHAPTER 2

When to Start

Let me state this simply: when is almost more important than how.

Unequivocally, potty training is easiest when done between the ages
of twenty and thirty months. It certainly can be done earlier or later,
with caveats. For instance, most children younger than twenty
months won’t connect the dots as quickly as older kids do, which
means you’ll need to be more responsible for acting on their cues (as
opposed to expecting them to act on their own) than you would be if
they were older.
However, before twenty months is unbelievably easier than after
thirty months. Kids over thirty months are that much more
sophisticated and skilled at manipulation. They know the power of
choice and free will. My mom likes to say, “You want to do it before
they know they have a choice in the matter.” Anyone with a three-
year-old can tell you they are very adept at exerting their will. Your
power struggles will be huge. And guess what? You won’t win.
Smack-dab in the middle of that twenty- to thirty-month-age
range is best for most people. Right around twenty-four months is
ideal. At this age, your child is eager to please, is connecting a lot of
the dots in the big world around him, is still malleable, and is dying
for more responsibility. Think about it. Kids at this age love helping