(e.g. hunger, sleep, messy diaper cues), and those that represent a
parenting style. Behavior pattern cues can be attributed to parenting
styles as much as temperament. For example, the three-month-old baby
who has a pattern of waking two, three, or four times in the middle of the
night to nurse is responding to his mother’s parenting style. In this case,
the need cue for food may be legitimate, but the greater question centers
on the greater parenting style cue—why is the child of this age repeatedly
hungry at night? Mothers will say, “But my baby is waking for comfort
nursing not just food.” We would still ask the same question at this age.
A baby nursing for comfort so many times during the night is a cue that
your parenting style during the day is causing too much discomfort.
A baby nursing every hour is another double cue. It may signal that
your baby is not getting the rich high-caloried hindmilk, and equally
important, that your baby is not getting enough healthy sleep. Healthy
sleep facilitates healthy nursing. Fatigue is another parenting style cue. If
mom is continually waking up each morning fatigued and discouraged
from her middle of the night experience, that is her body and emotion’s
way of telling her that what she is doing is not working.
In contrast, the baby who is growing and sleeping contently and
securely through the night is also responding to a parenting style. This is
a healthy response signaling that tummies are content as well as hearts.
What about the mom who wakes in the morning feeling rested? That
sense of restedness is a positive response cue to what she is doing.
Parents must learn how to distinguish between immediate need cues and
parenting style cues—both are important. One for short-term benefit and
one for long-term gain.
Milk Production
If breast-feeding is your choice, there are a few basic principles to grasp.
Let’s start with this simple fact. Breast-feeding success is based on
demand and supply. The supply of milk produced by the glands is
proportional to the demand placed on the system. The greater the
demand, the greater the supply. But how do you define demand?