“in-the-middle” suggested price (halfway between
my initial offer and her initial counter). Instead, I
believe I correctly assessed her motivations,
presented her with the right statement to get to a
“that’s right” (in her mind) . . . and then she
proposed the solution I wanted and asked if I would
agree to it! So, I did of course.
Thank you!
EmilyAnd I thought to myself: That’s right.KEY LESSONS
“Sleeping in the same bed and dreaming different dreams”
is an old Chinese expression that describes the intimacy of
partnership (whether in marriage or in business) without the
communication necessary to sustain it.
Such is the recipe for bad marriages and bad
negotiations.
With each party having its own set of objectives, its own
goals and motivations, the truth is that the conversational
niceties—the socially lubricating “yeses” and “you’re
rights” that get thrown out fast and furious early in any
interaction—are not in any way a substitute for real
understanding between you and your partner.
The power of getting to that understanding, and not to
some simple “yes,” is revelatory in the art of negotiation.
The moment you’ve convinced someone that you truly