Never Split the Difference: Negotiating as if Your Life Depended on It

Ever since the Dos Palmas debacle and the Pittsburgh
epiphany, I had been raring to employ the lessons we’d
learned about calibrated questions. So when José was
kidnapped, I sent my guys down to Ecuador and told them
that we had a new strategy. The kidnapping would provide
an opportunity to prove this approach.
“All we’re going to say is, ‘Hey, how do we know José
is okay? How are we supposed to pay until we know José is
okay?’ Again and again,” I told them.
Although they were queasy about untested techniques,
my guys were game. The local cops were livid, though,
because they always did proof of life the old-fashioned way
(which the FBI had taught them in the first place). Luckily
Julie was with us 100 percent because she saw how the
calibrated questions would stall for time, and she was
convinced that with enough time her husband would find a
way to get home.
The day after the kidnapping, the rebels marched José
into the mountains along the Colombian border and settled
in a cabin high in the jungle. There José built a rapport with
the kidnappers to make himself harder for them to kill. He
impressed them with his knowledge of the jungle and, with
a black belt in karate, he filled the time by teaching them
martial arts.
My negotiators coached Julie every day as we waited for
contact from the rebels. We learned later that the designated
negotiator from José’s captors had to walk to town to
negotiate by phone.