Never Split the Difference: Negotiating as if Your Life Depended on It

But Chris Watts had one last trick up his sleeve. He
pulled a fast one on us and out of the blue, offered to come
out. Maybe he thought he could catch us off guard one last
time. What was strange about his sudden appearance was
that he seemed to be looking about, surveying the scene,
like he still thought he’d somehow elude capture. Right up
until the moment the cops put the handcuffs on him, his
gaze was darting back and forth, scanning for some kind of
opportunity. The bright lights were on this guy, he was
basically surrounded, but somewhere in the back of his
scheming, racing mind he still thought he had a chance.
It was a long, long day, but it went down in the books as
a success. Nobody was hurt. The bad guys were in custody.
And I emerged from the experience humbled by how much
more there was to learn, but at the same time, awakened to
and inspired by the elemental power of emotion, dialogue,
and the FBI’s evolving toolbox of applied psychological
tactics to influence and persuade just about anyone in any
situation.
In the decades since my initiation into the world of high-
stakes negotiations, I’ve been struck again and again by
how valuable these seemingly simple approaches can be.
The ability to get inside the head—and eventually under the
skin—of your counterpart depends on these techniques and
a willingness to change your approach, based on new
evidence, along the way. As I’ve worked with executives
and students to develop these skills, I always try to reinforce
the message that being right isn’t the key to a successful