A
s social, interactive beings, our ability to create and maintain warm, caring, empathic relation-
ships is one of the essential building blocks for future psychological and social maturity and
happiness (Burns & Street, 2003; Thompson & Gullone, 2003). Several authors claim that the highly
valued individualism of modern Western culture is not conducive to the development of prosocial
behaviors (Burns & Street, 2003; George, 1999; Gullone, 2000). When children develop empathy,
caring, and compassion for another person, they are less likely to engage in violence, aggression, or
other conduct disorders. Learning positive relationship skills is healthy, both emotionally and physi-
cally, as it improves immune system functioning and lowers rates of cancer, cholesterol, and prema-
ture death (Seligman, 2002; Valliant, 2002).
The stories here seek to address questions like, What do you do when you find yourself caught
in the middle of a conflict, such as a parental battle for custody of you? How do you effectively make
and maintain friendships? How do you learn to work cooperatively with other people? When faced
with an impasse, how can you negotiate a solution? How do you learn to take time for yourself? How
do you find ways of expressing tenderness, or learn how to put yourself in someone else’s place?
CHAPTER 7
Managing Relationships