“I’ll go to football matches and other places where there are big crowds. I’ll ride around mak-
ing sure everyone does everything right.”
“Yes,” I said, “this is really what a policewoman’s job is about, isn’t it—helping to keep control.
Have you started to practice the things you need to do to be a policewoman?”
“Mom has promised to give me horse-riding lessons as a Christmas present,” answered Natalie.
“But there are other things you might need to do as well,” I suggested. “Let’s imagine that you
wanted to help an elderly person across a busy road. What would you do?”
Natalie stood up proudly, extended an arm, the palm of her hand raised to face the imaginary
traffic; she called out in a firm voice, “Stop.” She stood there waiting for the imagined elderly per-
son to cross the street and then waved the traffic on.
“Good,” I said. “I think you will make a good policewoman. A lot of good police work is learn-
ing how to stop things, isn’t it? You need to stop the traffic. You might need to stop a robber bur-
gling a house or robbing a bank. You might need to stop someone painting graffiti on a wall, or stop
people fighting.
“I wonder how you can practice your police voice, ‘Stop.’ Maybe that old habit of yours that
we’ve been working on is a starting point. When you do it, perhaps you can stand up, put your hand
up like you did for the imaginary traffic, and call out ‘Stop’ in a firm, police-like voice.”
I continued, “Perhaps we ought to explain to Mom that you’re practicing how to be a police-
woman. Sometimes parents get a little worried when kids start doing things differently. She might
not understand what’s going on and think, I should never have taken Natalie to see that psychologist—
she really is going crazy now.Would you like me to explain or would you rather explain to her your-
self ?”
When I saw Natalie the next week she told me she had been practicing her policewoman’s skills
of making her habit stop, and that it was going pretty well.
I asked her to imagine she was helping that elderly person across the street just as she had done
the week before. She stood up proudly, extended her arm to the full, her palm facing the imaginary
traffic, and called out, “Stop!” Her voice was firmer and stronger. She waited until the imaginary per-
son had crossed the imaginary road and then waved the imaginary traffic on.
“Ah-ha. What did you just do?” I asked.
“I waved the traffic on,” she said, looking a little puzzled.
“So, what else do policewomen do to exercise control as well as stopping some things that hap-
pen?”
She smiled. “They start things happening too. I started the traffic flowing again.”
“Exactly,” I said. “A good police officer wants to stop a bad thing from happening so that more
good things can start. Some police officers focus primarily on starting the good things. They run po-
lice youth clubs, do community programs, and set up neighborhood watch schemes. At times they
can help to stop what they don’twant to happen by starting what they dowant to happen.”
The next week, Natalie proudly announced, “I’ve kept practicing being a policewoman. I can
tell my habit to stop and I can do something different when it feels like it’s going to happen.”
“What have you done?” I asked.
“Those times when I thought the habit was about to happen I’d say ‘Stop,’ then go and talk to
Mom, take Toby—my dog—for a walk, phone a friend for a chat, or go and play a game on the com-
puter.”
188 Healing Stories, Teaching Stories