tion may help youngstersdodifferent things but stories create experiences that enable them to bedif-
ferent.
Encouraging Desired Behaviors
Another value for communicating with therapeutically crafted stories is that, in the process, they teach
children patterns of behavior and skills that are, hopefully, useful for their maturation. Storytelling is
not authoritarian and thus enables a greater feeling of equality in the relationship. The child is not be-
ing told what to think, feel, or do but is encouraged to think independently. An opportunity is avail-
able to his or her own ideas and attitudes. Metaphoric stories, thus, help foster greater problem-solving
and decision-making skills. What is the character going to do? How is she or he going to solve this
problem? Will this approach or that approach work best? What are the likely outcomes?
Such questions have the child searching for answers, testing his or her own potential solutions
against those of the character, finding what is helpful and what is not. In this process of creating pos-
sibilities, weighing up options, and looking for solutions, the child is learning the skills of decision-
making. What does the character need to do to fix the problem? How may he or she find the solution?
In journeying with a character through these questions, children learn to weigh the possibilities and
probabilities and to make their own considered judgments, and thus prepare themselves for the in-
dependent decision-making skills they will need throughout life’s journey.
Learning with Enjoyment
As I look back on my school days, two teachers stand out for having made the process of education
positive and enjoyable for me. One was from elementary school and the other from high school. Both
taught with stories, and some of those stories I remember to this day. While we are a species self-
protectively equipped to learn quickly from situations of fear and trauma, most of our learning is en-
hanced through an environment that is positive, enjoyable, and supportive. Storytelling can con-
tribute to those educational characteristics, creating a pleasant learning experience for both parent
and child. It has the potential to be a joyful, humorous, fun process for relating and learning.
STEPS FOR TEACHING PARENTS STORYTELLINGThe steps for teaching parents to tell stories that communicate values, information, healing, or other
life lessons are much the same as I have provided for therapists in the preceding chapter. Here I pre-
sent them more in the language and style that I might use for communicating them to a parent.
Step 1:Find the Outcome for the Story
You may want to choose a value, a message, or something that youthink may be helpful for your
child, or you can discuss the outcome of the story with the childthrough questions like, “If I told you
a story about Fred Mouse (or whoever) tonight, what would you like to happen in the end? How
would you like him to feel? What would you like him to do differently?”
270 Creating Your Own Healing Stories for Kids