Hillbilly Elegy

advantage” of someone is the measure in
my mind of having a parent. For me and
Lindsay, the fear of imposing stalked our
minds, infecting even the food we ate.
We recognized instinctively that many of
the people we depended on weren’t
supposed to play that role in our lives,
so much so that it was one of the first
things Lindsay thought of when she
learned of Papaw’s death. We were
conditioned to feel that we couldn’t
really depend on people—that, even as
children, asking someone for a meal or
for help with a broken-down automobile
was a luxury that we shouldn’t indulge in
too much lest we fully tap the reservoir
of goodwill serving as a safety valve in