The Book of Joy

experience or knowledge, there is much less envy. But most important is
to develop a sense of concern for others’ well-being. If you have genuine
kindness or compassion, then when someone gets something or has more
success you are able to rejoice in their good fortune. For a person who is
committed to compassion practice and a genuine sense of concern for
others’ well-being, then you will rejoice in others’ good fortune because
you will be happy that what that person aspires for is being obtained.”
The Dalai Lama was describing the Buddhist concept of mudita, which
is often translated as “sympathetic joy” and described as the antidote to
envy. Mudita is so important in Buddhism that it is considered one of the
Four Immeasurables, qualities we can cultivate infinitely. The other three
are loving-kindness, compassion, and equanimity.
Jinpa had explained how mudita works: If someone has something
that we want, say, a bigger house, we can consciously take joy in their
good fortune by telling ourselves: “Good for him. Just like me, he, too,
wants to be happy. He, too, wants to be successful. He, too, wants to
support his family. May he be happy. I congratulate him and want him to
have more success.” Mudita recognizes that life is not a zero-sum game,
that there is not just one slice of cake in which someone else’s taking
more means we get less. Mudita sees joy as limitless.
As mentioned earlier, mudita is also the opposite feeling to
schadenfreude, the German word for the feeling of satisfaction or
pleasure in hearing of others’ misfortune. Schadenfreude sees us in a
constant struggle of one against all others, and if someone else succeeds
or accomplishes something, then we are somehow diminished, less
successful, less acceptable, less lovable. Schadenfreude is a natural
outgrowth of envy. Mudita is a natural outgrowth of compassion.
Mudita is based on the recognition of our interdependence, or Ubuntu.
The Archbishop explains that in African villages, one would ask in
greeting, “How are we?” This understanding sees that someone else’s
achievements or happiness is in a very real way our own. The Archbishop
frequently marvels at the extraordinary beauty and talent that we humans
have. “Look how beautiful you all are,” he will say to a gathered crowd.
Unfortunately, however, most of us want to cut others down to our self-