The Book of Joy

you will want all others to be free from suffering and enjoy happiness.
The desire for happiness is a natural instinct shared by everyone. It is
simply a sense of concern once again for others’ well-being.”
“Obviously, envy is not a virtue,” the Archbishop said, cautious once
again that our self-development might lead to self-reproach. “Yet I would
hope we would not make someone feel guilty, at least initially, about
something that springs up spontaneously. You can’t do very much about
that feeling, but you can counter it.”
“Like physical illness,” the Dalai Lama insisted. “Preventive
measures are the best way. Yes, if some disease has already developed,
then there’s no other choice but to take medicine. So similarly, once a
person develops a strong negative emotion, like anger or jealousy, it is
very difficult to counter it at that moment. So the best thing is to cultivate
your mind through practice so that you can learn to prevent it from
arising in the first place. For example, the major source of anger is
frustration and dissatisfaction. At the moment when an emotion like
anger is full-blown, even if we try to use our experience and our
knowledge to reduce it, we will find it is very difficult to stop. At that
point it is like a flood. During monsoon season, it is too late to stop the
flooding. We need to start early in the spring and investigate what is
causing the flooding and try to build flood walls to prevent disaster.
“Similarly, for our mental health also, the earlier we start practicing
preventive measures, the easier and more effective they are. When we are
already sick it is hard to remember our doctor’s advice. I think no doctor
would say, If you have more anger, you will be healthier. Does your
doctor say that?”
“No,” the Archbishop agreed.
“Doctors always advise us to relax. Relax means calm mind. Not too
much agitation, which will destroy your relaxation. Also, too much
attachment will destroy your peace of mind,” the Dalai Lama said,
returning again to envy and jealousy. “You can have a nice house with a
nice bedroom and a nice bath, and play relaxing music, but if you are full
of anger, full of jealousy, full of attachment, you will never be able to
relax. In contrast, you may be sitting on a rock with nothing, but if your