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1.

Perspective: There Are Many Different

Angles

s we said right at the beginning, joy is a by-product,” the Archbishop
began. “If you set out and say, I want to be happy, clenching your
teeth with determination, this is the quickest way of missing the bus.” So
if joy and happiness are by-products, what exactly are they by-products
of? It was time to delve deeper into the qualities of mind and heart that
we needed to cultivate to catch that bus.
“We have now covered the nature of true joy and the obstacles to joy,”
I said as we began our fourth day of dialogues. “Now we are ready to
move on to the positive qualities that allow us to experience more joy.”
We had discussed the topic of mental immunity in reducing fear and
anger and other obstacles to joy, but the Dalai Lama had explained that
mental immunity was also about filling our mind and heart with positive
thoughts and feelings. As our dialogue progressed, we converged on eight
pillars of joy. Four were qualities of the mind: perspective, humility,
humor, and acceptance. Four were qualities of the heart: forgiveness,
gratitude, compassion, and generosity.
On the first day, the Archbishop had touched the fingers of his right
hand to his heart to emphasize its centrality. We would end up,
ultimately, at compassion and generosity, and indeed both men would
insist that these two qualities were perhaps most pivotal to any lasting
happiness. Yet we needed to begin with some fundamental qualities of
the mind that would allow us to turn more easily and frequently to the
compassionate and generous response to life. As the Dalai Lama had said
at the start of our dialogues, we create most of our suffering, so we
should be able to create more joy. The key, he had explained, was our