The Book of Joy

understand or to put into practice. The word compassion, as we have said,
literally means ‘suffering with.’ So what would you say to the person who
says, ‘I have enough problems of my own. Why should I worry about
being more compassionate and think about others who are suffering?’”
“As we have discussed,” the Dalai Lama began, “we are social
animals. Even for kings or queens or spiritual leaders, their survival
depends on the rest of the community. So therefore, if you want a happy
life and fewer problems, you have to develop a serious concern for the
well-being of others. So then when someone is passing through a difficult
period or difficult circumstances, then automatically will come a sense of
concern for their well-being. And if there is the possibility to help, then
you can help. If there is no possibility to help, you can just pray or wish
them well.
“Even other social animals have this same concern for each other. I
think the other day I also mentioned how scientists have found that when
two mice are together, if one is injured, the other will lick it. The injured
mouse that is being licked by another mouse will heal much faster than a
mouse that is alone.
“This concern for others is something very precious. We humans have
a special brain, but this brain causes a lot of suffering because it is always
thinking me, me, me, me. The more time you spend thinking about
yourself, the more suffering you will experience. The incredible thing is
that when we think of alleviating other people’s suffering, our own
suffering is reduced. This is the true secret to happiness. So this is a very
practical thing. In fact, it is common sense.”
“So will the mouse that does the licking benefit as well?” I asked.
The Dalai Lama spoke in Tibetan, and Jinpa translated: “One could
argue that the mouse doing the licking is better off, and is also in a
calmer state of mind.”
The Archbishop laughed at all of this discussion of mice and the need
for scientific justifications for what, to him, was so obviously at the very
core of our humanity. “I would say that one of the ways to show that
compassion is something we want to become is the very fact that we
admire compassionate people. You know, you don’t—very, very few of