STATE MY PATH 135Or: "I know there are at least two sides to this story. Could we
hear differing views now? What problems could this decision
cause us?"
Play devil's advocate. Occasionally you can tell that others are
not buying into your facts or story, but they're not speaking up
either. You've sincerely invited them, even encouraged differing
views, but nobody says anything. To help grease the skids, play
devil's advocate. Model disagreeing by disagreeing with your
own view. "Maybe I'm wrong here. What if the opposite is true?
What if the reason sales have dropped is because ... "
BACK TO THE MOTELTo see how all of the STATE skills fit together in a touchy con
versation, let's return to the motel bill. Only this time, Carole
does a far better job of bringing up a delicate issue.
BOB: Hi honey, how was your day?
CAROLE: Not so good.
BOB: Why's that?
CAROLE: I was checking our credit card bill, and I noticed a
charge of forty-eight dollars for the Good Night Motel
down the street. [Shares fa cts]
BOB: Boy, that sounds wrong.
CAROLE: It sure does.
BOB: Well, don't worry. I'll check into it one day when I'm
going by.
CAROLE: I'd feel better if we checked right now.
BOB: Really? It's less than fifty bucks. It can wait.
CAROLE: It's not the money that has me worried.
BOB: You're worried?