Boundaries

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Though having wishes and desires is a God-given trait (Prov. 13:4),
we are to keep them in line with healthy goals and responsibility.
For one thing, we may not want what we need. Mr. Insensi-
tive may desperately need help with the fact that he’s a terrible
listener. But he may not want it. God is much more interested
in meeting our needs than he is granting all our wishes. For
example, he denied Paul’s wish to heal his “thorn in the flesh”
(2 Cor. 12:7–10). At the same time, he met Paul’s needs to the
point that Paul felt content and full:

I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to

have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in

any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry,

whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything

through him who gives me strength. (Phil. 4:12–13)

It helps the Christian afraid of setting boundaries to know

that God meets our needs. “God will meet all your needs

according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus” (Phil. 4:19). At

the same time, God does not make our wishes and desires “all

bad” either. He will meet many of them.

Our Needs Are Our Responsibility
Even with God’s help, however, it is crucial to understand
that meeting our own needs is basically our job. We can’t wait
passively for others to take care of us. Jesus told us to “Ask.. .seek

.. .knock” (Matt. 7:7). We are to “work out [our] salvation with
fear and trembling” (Phil. 2:12). Even knowing that “it is God
who works in [us]” (Phil. 2:13), we are our own responsibility.
This is a very different picture than many of us are used to.
Some individuals see their needs as bad, selfish, and at best, a
luxury. Others see them as something that God or others should
do for them. But the biblical picture is clear: our lives are our
responsibility.
At the end of our lives this truth becomes crystal clear. We
will all “appear before the judgment seat of Christ, that each one
may receive what is due him for the things done while in the
body, whether good or bad” (2 Cor. 5:10). A sobering thought.

Boundaries