Three Mistakes of My Life by Chetan Bhagat

I looked at him dumbstruck. What a random guess. And what the hell is his
business anyway. 'What?' I said, surprised. 'Don't lie to me.'
'C'mon Omi why would I call Vidya?' 'I'm not that stupid.' 'You are,' I said.
We walked towards the restaurant with me three steps ahead of him.
'I've seen the way you guys look at each other,' he said as he tried to catch up
with me.
'Get lost,' I said and walked faster. We came to Campbell Parade, a strip of bars
and cafes near the beach.
'And I've noticed. You never talk about her since you started teaching her,' he
said.
I went inside 'Hog's Breath Cafe'. After five days in this country the name didn't
seem weird anymore.
We sat facing each other. I lifted the menu to cover my face and avoid
conversation.
'You can hide if you want. But I know.'
I slid the menu down.
'It's nothing, ok maybe something. But nothing to worry about,' I said.
I hid behind the menu again.
'There is an unspoken rule among Indian men, and you broke
it.'
'What rule?' I said and slammed the menu on the table.
'You don't hit upon your best friend's sister. You just don't. It is against the
protocol.'
'Protocol? What is this, the army? And I didn't hit on her. She hit upon me,' I
said.
'But you let her hit upon you. You let her.' 'Well, it wasn't exactly like being hit.
it didn't hurt. It felt good,' I said.
I played with the toothpicks on the table to avoid eye
Contact.
'Fuck man, how far are you guys?'
'What? Hey Omi, go call Ish for lunch. We are here and he has no idea.'
'Yes, he really has no idea,' Omi said and left.
A noisy gang played on the pool table near us. I had five minutes until Ish
came back. Thoughts came to me. Will Omi say something stupid to him? No, Omi
was not that stupid.
Omi and Ish walked in laughing. Ok, all is good.
'Hog's Breath? Can you think of a worse name for a restaurant?' Ish said and
laughed.
‘I can,’ Omi said.
'Don't say it. Anyway, where's the toilet? I have to go siphon the...,' Ish said.
'Over there,' I interrupted him and pointed to the corner. I had enough of
Aussies for a lifetime.
'Are you intimate with her?' Omi continued. 'Did you say anything to him?' I
said. 'You think I'm stupid?' 'Yeah.'
'I didn't. Now tell me, what stage are you in the relationship?' Omi said.
'Stage?' I said.
'Yes, there is a "we-just-look" stage, the most common stage in the old city.
Then a "we-just-talk" stage. Then a "hold-hand" stage. Then a...'
'It's not like that. It's different between us.'