190 PowerPhrases in Action
see changed, how the behavior is affecting you or the company,
what you appreciate about her or her perspective, and what
behavior you want her to embrace.
PowerPhrases to Address Issues Are
Targeted
Mindy had two goals in this conversation. Her primary goal
was to get Brenda to stop being so harsh in meetings. Her sec-
ond goal was to keep her job. She succeeded in both.
Mindy may have been tempted to argue when Brenda
accused Mindy of telling her how to do her job. She didn’t.
Instead she said,
I understand why it might sound like I am telling you
how to do your job. It’s not my intention to do that.Had she argued with Brenda’s accusations, she would have
started an argument that she couldn’t win. She would have got-
ten off track from the results she wanted.
Remember to ask yourself,
What specific outcome do I want to achieve?What words are most likely to get me there?Make certain that your suggestions consider the other person’s
needs and goals as well as your own. Stay focused on your
desired result and the words that will get you there.