What He Says Is Not What She Hears 195
PowerPhrases between the Genders
Are Short
Be brief in speaking with men and women—but a bit briefer
with the men than with the women. Men are used to very quick
conversations, such as,
Lunch?Yeah.12:30 p.m.—Joe’s Diner.For women this may sound too abrupt as they are more
inclined to say,
It’s been a long time since we had lunch together.
Would today work for you?Sure! I was going to have lunch with Mary, but she
cancelled.Really. Why did she cancel? (etc.)Many men communicate on a need-to-know basis. If they
don’t think you need to know something, they’ll see no reason
to communicate. As a woman, I was amazed that when one of
my son’s friends was fired from his job, none of his male
coworkers found out why. The subject never came up. They saw
no need to know. Women would be far more likely to want to
discuss all aspects of the situation. Don’t personalize those dif-
ferences. It isn’t personal!