16 Why PowerPhrases?
PowerPhrases Are Not Mean When You
Say Them
I hear your grumbling about this principle. I hear the moans
and groans and the “Oh, no—you mean I can’t have at them?
It all sounded so doable until now!” That’s right. PowerPhrases
are designed to communicate without attack. Clarity without
barbarity!
PowerPhrases are not venting, dumping, or unloading. Eric
clearly communicated how I was coming across with him. He
was in no way attacking me. He did not respond in the same
condescending tone he had heard from me, and he did not use
sarcasm. He was clear and direct, yet very respectful.
This means you do not get to indulge in sarcasm, mixed
messages, and sideswipes! Sometimes people think PowerPhrases
are the “gotcha” comments where you come across as clever and
the other person cannot respond. Sorry—“I love your hair. Do
you cut it yourself?” is NOT a PowerPhrase.
Now that you have all six PowerPhrases Principles—now
that you know all six parts of the PowerPhrase Definition—
apply all six guidelines to your words. The result will be Power-
Phrases. If your words don’t meet all six criteria, rethink them!
It would be much easier to pick words that only meet a few of
the guidelines. Easier—yes—and much less effective. Don’t
worry if it sounds impossible at this point. You are about to get
a much deeper understanding of the PowerPhrase Principles and
lots of practice in applying them to everyday situations. These
six, simple elements will guide you to getting your message
clearly across. But first, let’s take a careful look at the words you
don’t want to use. Let’s examine Poison Phrases.