Selling Yourself in Negotiations 173
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Selling Yourself in Negotiations
C 173 c
THE DICTIONARY DEFINES the verb negotiate as: “to confer with an-
other in bargaining or trade. To hold conference and discussion
with a view to reaching agreement on contract.” Nowhere does it
say that negotiation must involve argument, tantrums, hostility,
animosity, or hatred. But unfortunately, that’s the meaning man-
agement-labor disputes and acrimonious lawsuits have given the
word.
Yet, in truth, every time you buy a product, you’ve negoti-
ated, you’ve reached agreement on a contract. The dealer put a
price tag on his product and you decided to buy it or not. There
may be some room for further negotiations over price, terms, time
of delivery, and so forth, but in the end, you either buy the prod-
uct or you don’t. So ends every negotiation. A decision is made. If
it’s a good deal for both parties, the negotiation ends successfully.
If it isn’t a good deal, it doesn’t. That’s the perfect negotiation. It
begins, it ends, and everyone is satisfied that the right decision
has been made.
But there are very few opportunities for perfect negotiations
left. In most of our everyday transactions, the terms are set with
no room for negotiation. And when there is negotiating room, the
situation is often turned into a confrontation.
We’ve already seen that in such adversarial situations if only
one person wins, both lose. In contract talks, in family arguments,
in all imperfect negotiation situations, it’s vital to realize that if
both sides receive fair treatment, both sides come out winners. If