'O idiot,' cried Ramakrishna, 'who said that? Fold your hands and say humbly, "O God,
we are too feeble and too weak to understand Thy nature and Thy deeds. Deign to
enlighten us!" Do not argue. Love!' God is no doubt Good, True, and Beautiful; but
these attributes are utterly different from their counterparts in the relative world.
The Swami, during these days, taught his disciples to worship God like heroes. He
would say: 'There must be no fear, no begging, but demanding — demanding the
Highest. The true devotees of the Mother are as hard, as adamant and as fearless as
lions. They are not in the least upset if the whole universe suddenly crumbles into dust
at their feet. Make Her listen to you. None of that cringing to Mother! Remember, She
is all-powerful; She can make heroes out of stones.'
On September 30 Swami Vivekananda retired to a temple of the Divine Mother, where
he stayed alone for a week. There he worshipped the Deity, known as Kshirbhavani,
following the time-honoured ritual, praying and meditating like a humble pilgrim.
Every morning he also worshipped a brahmin's little daughter as the symbol of the
Divine Virgin. And he was blessed with deep experiences, some of which were most
remarkable and indicated to him that his mission on earth was finished.
He had a vision of the Goddess and found Her a living Deity. But the temple had been
destroyed by the Moslem invaders, and the image placed in a niche surrounded by
ruins. Surveying this desecration, the Swami felt distressed at heart and said to himself:
'How could the people have permitted such sacrilege without offering strenuous
resistance? If I had been here then, I would never have allowed such a thing. I would
have laid down my life to protect the Mother.' Thereupon he heard the voice of the
Goddess saying: 'What if unbelievers should enter My temple and defile My image?
What is that to you? Do you protect Me, or do I protect you?' Referring to this
experience after his return, he said to his disciples: 'All my patriotism is gone.
Everything is gone. Now it is only "Mother! Mother!" I have been very wrong...I am
only a little child.' He wanted to say more, but could not; he declared that it was not
fitting that he should go on. Significantly, he added that spiritually he was no longer
bound to the world.
Another day, in the course of his worship, the thought flashed through the Swami's
mind that he should try to build a new temple in the place of the present dilapidated
one, just as he had built a monastery and temple at Belur to Sri Ramakrishna. He even
thought of trying to raise funds from his wealthy American disciples and friends. At
once the Mother said to him: 'My child! If I so wish I can have innumerable temples
and monastic centres. I can even this moment raise a seven-storied golden temple on
this very spot.'
'Since I heard that divine voice,' the Swami said to a disciple in Calcutta much later, 'I
have ceased making any more plans. Let these things be as Mother wills.'
Sri Ramakrishna had said long ago that Narendranath would live in the physical body
to do the Mother's work and that as soon as this work was finished, he would cast off