ducks unfortunately died yesterday. She had been gasping for breath more than a week.
One of my waggish old monks says, "Sir, it is no use living in the Kaliyuga, when
ducks catch cold from damp and rain, and frogs sneeze!" One of the geese had her
plumes falling off. Knowing no other method of treatment, I left her some minutes in a
tub of water mixed with mild carbolic, so that it might either kill or heal — and she is
all right now.'
Thus Swami Vivekananda tried to lead a carefree life at the monastery, sometimes
going about the grounds clad in his loin-cloth, sometimes supervising the cooking
arrangements and himself preparing some delicacies for the inmates, and sometimes
joining his disciples and brother monks in the singing of devotional music. At other
times he imparted spiritual instruction to the visitors, or engaged in deep thought
whenever his inner spirit was stirred up, occupied himself with serious study in his
room, or explained to the members of the Math the intricate passages of the scriptures
and unfolded to them his scheme of future work.
Though his body was wearing away day by day, his mind was luminous. At times his
eyes assumed a far-away look, showing how tired he was of the world. One day he
said, 'For one thing we may be grateful: this life is not eternal.'
The illness did not show any sign of abatement, but that did not dampen his spirit to
work. When urged to rest, he said to a disciple: 'My son, there is no rest for me. That
which Sri Ramakrishna called "Kali" took possession of my body and soul three or
four days before his passing away. That makes me work and work and never lets me
keep still or look to my personal comfort.' Then he told the disciple how the Master,
before his passing away, had transmitted his spiritual power to him.
During the later part of 1901 the Swami observed all the religious festivals at the Math.
The Divine Mother was worshipped in strict orthodox fashion during the Durga-puja,
Lakshmi-puja and Kali-puja. On the occasion of the Durga-puja the poor were given a
sumptuous feast. Thus the Swami demonstrated the efficacy of religious rituals in the
development of the spiritual life. In February 1902 the birth anniversary of Sri
Ramakrishna was celebrated at the Belur Math, and over thirty thousand devotees
gathered for the occasion. But the Swami was feverish. He was confined to his room
by the swelling of his legs. From the windows he watched the dancing and the music of
the devotees.
To the disciple who was attending him the Swami said: 'He who has realized the
Atman becomes a storehouse of great power. From him as the centre a spiritual force
emanates, working within a certain radius; people who come within this circle become
inspired with his ideas and are overwhelmed by them. Thus without much religious
striving they derive benefit from the spiritual experience of an illumined person. This
is called grace.' 'Blessed are those,' the Swami continued, 'who have seen Sri
Ramakrishna. All of you, too, will get his vision. When you have come here, you are
very near to him. Nobody has been able to understand him who came on earth as Sri
Ramakrishna. Even his own nearest devotees have no real clue to it. Only some have a
little inkling of it. All will understand in time.'