is pretending, role-playing, politicking, and superficial politeness
but shallow conversation. People wear masks, keep their guard
up, and act as if everything is rosy in their lives. These attitudes
are the death of real fellowship.
It is only as we become open about our lives that we experience
real fellowship. The Bible says, “If we live in the light, as God is in
the light, we can share fellowship with each other.... If we say we
have no sin, we are fooling ourselves.”^2 The world thinks intimacy
occurs in the dark, but God says it happens in the light. Darkness
is used to hide our hurts, faults,
fears, failures, and flaws. But in the
light, we bring them all out into the
open and admit who we really are.
Of course, being authentic
requires both courage and humility.
It means facing our fear of
exposure, rejection, and being hurt
again. Why would anyone take such
a risk? Because it is the only way to grow spiritually and be
emotionally healthy. The Bible says, “Make this your common
practice: Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so
that you can live together whole and healed.”^3 We only grow by
taking risks, and the most difficult risk of all is to be honest with
ourselves and with others.
In real fellowship people experience mutuality. Mutuality is
the art of giving and receiving. It’s depending on each other. The
Bible says, “The way God designed our bodies is a model for
understanding our lives together as a church: every part dependent
on every other part.”^4 Mutuality is the heart of fellowship:
building reciprocal relationships, sharing responsibilities, and
helping each other. Paul said, “I want us to help each other with the
faith we have. Your faith will help me, and my faith will help you.”^5
All of us are more consistent in our faith when others walk with
us and encourage us. The Bible commands mutual accountability,
The Purpose-Driven Life 140Real fellowship happens
when people get honest about
who they are and what is
happening in their lives.