Present Over Perfect

But over time I realized they weren’t necessarily great things
for me. They were maybe someone else’s great things, and I
was both taking up the space that was meant for them and
not standing in my own space, like wearing someone else’s
shoes, leaving them barefoot.
Along the way I’ve realized that most of the hard work
during my last couple seasons has been claiming authority
over my own life. This is not a group decision. We’re not
voting for “most this” or “most that” in our yearbooks. This
is actually my life, and it doesn’t matter a bit if it would be
lovely for someone else to live. What does matter: does it
feel congruent with how God made me and called me?
Some of us are made to be faster, and some slower,
some of us louder, and some quieter. Some of us are made
to build things and nurture things. Some of us are made to
write songs and grants and novels, all different things. And
I’m finding that one of the greatest delights in life is walking
away from what someone told you you should be in favor
of walking toward what you truly love, in your own heart, in
your own secret soul.
I thought I needed to be fast and efficient, sparkly and
shiny, battle-ready and inexhaustible. There was, I will be
honest with you, a lot of pressure from all sorts of places. I
could be those things and so I was, and then lots of people
told me I had a responsibility to do more and more and
more. For a long time, I listened to them.
But what I’ve learned the hard way is you don’t answer
to a wide swath of people and their opinions, even if they’re