Present Over Perfect

and I’m not great at that stuff, and there’s more that we just
leave undone. But here’s the thing: I have my wife back.
And it’s totally, completely worth it.”
That’s why this journey matters. Because I was on a
dangerous track, where I was giving the best of myself to
people and things “out there,” while the tender inner core of
m y life and my home were increasingly stretched,
pressurized, brittle. And now they’re not. Now the most
beautiful, well-tended, truly nurtured and nourished parts of
my life are the innermost ones, not the flashy public ones.
That’s just as it should be.
We are, as I’ve mentioned, not a family of conventional
traditions. There are a couple rituals, though, that we’ve
developed over the years that I truly love. The first:
Christmas and New Year’s on the beach. The week before
Christmas we open presents, celebrate with various family
and friends. We’re a part of the many Christmas services at
our church, and we watch our kids in their holiday programs
—this year Mac was the innkeeper, and Henry sang
“Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree” with the rest of his
third-grade class—with extremely festive motions. And then
early on Christmas morning, we throw our bags in the car
and meet the rest of my family at the airport for the flight
south just as the sun is coming up.
And on that trip, there are two more traditions: on New
Year’s Eve, we batter and deep-fry everything in sight—this
year, lobster, conch, potatoes, pickles, bananas, baby bell
peppers stuffed with cheese. And then after dinner and