Being Mortal

(Martin Jones) #1

opposite.Theresultswereunequivocal.Farfromgrowing
unhappier, people reported more positive emotions as
theyaged.Theybecamelesspronetoanxiety,depression,
andanger.Theyexperiencedtrials,tobesure,andmore
momentsofpoignancy—thatis,ofpositiveandnegative
emotionmixedtogether.Butoverall,theyfoundlivingto
beamoreemotionallysatisfyingandstableexperienceas
time passed, even as old age narrowed the lives they led.


Thefindingsraisedafurtherquestion.Ifweshiftaswe
age toward appreciating everyday pleasures and
relationships ratherthan towardachieving, having,and
getting,andifwefindthismorefulfilling,thenwhydo
wetakesolongtodoit?Whydowewaituntilwe’reold?
The common view was that theselessons arehard to
learn.Livingisakindofskill.Thecalmandwisdomof
old age are achieved over time.


Carstensenwasattractedtoadifferentexplanation.What
ifthechangeinneedsanddesireshasnothingtodowith
age per se? Suppose it merely has to do with
perspective—yourpersonalsenseofhowfiniteyourtime
in this world is. This idea was regarded in scientific
circles as somewhatodd.But Carstensen had herown
reasonforthinkingthatone’spersonalperspectivemight
be centrally important—a near-death experience that
radically changed her viewpoint on her own life.


Itwas1974.Shewastwenty-one,withaninfantathome
andamarriagealreadyindivorceproceedings.Shehad
onlyahighschooleducationandalifethatnoone—least
ofallshe—wouldhavepredictedmightsomedayleadto
aneminentscientificcareer.Butonenight,sheleftthe
babywithherparentsandwentoutwithfriendstoparty

Free download pdf