Romantic rituals remind men that to receive the love they
want, they have to continue doing little things for a woman.
A man should not expect it just to happen. He doesn’t expect
his business to flourish without hard work, nor should he ex-
pect romance to be different. By remembering that his purpose
is greater than the old way of having relationships, he is then
motivated to learn more and find new ways of relating.
THE THIRD ATTRIBUTE: RESPONSIBILITY
When a man does what he says he will do, he automatically
expresses a sense of responsibility; he radiates a sense of con-
fidence that he will do what he sets out to do. It doesn’t even
matter if a woman has met him before or has experienced his
being responsible. She will assume him to be confident and
purposeful. She will be drawn to him like a bee to honey.
When a woman is attracted to a successful or influential
man, what she is really attracted to is the responsible side of
him that made him successful. The long hours required and
the extra push to make something happen cause him to eman-
ate a sense of responsibility. Even if he is not responsible in all
areas of his life, his ability to be passionately purposeful and
responsible to what is most important to him will always show.
When a man is responsible, it says he cares, and that is what
women are most hungry for. When a woman dates a man, she
needs to feel not that he is just wanting to take from her, but
that he wants to find a meaningful relationship. The more he
cares, the more she can trust him. One way a man can express
this caring in dating is by taking care of the little things. Each
time he does, it reassures her that with him she does not have
to be “on” all the time. His sense of responsibility allows her
to relax.
300 / JOHN GRAY, PH.D.