tunity to experience the chemistry that comes from shared
maturity. There are all kinds of support groups. There are
church-sponsored groups, “parents without partners” groups,
Alcoholics Anonymous groups, and so on. All of these places
are excellent for making new friends who will open many new
doors to find your soul mate.
By attending support groups we can find
people with similar maturity.If you are not making the changes you feel you should be
making, then you will be less attractive to others. A potential
soul mate may just feel something is missing. What is missing
is another attempt to put your life in order.
Putting Our Lives in OrderWhen Justin heard this, he realized that he had been afraid
once again to try to quit smoking. He thought that if he tried
he would just fail. When he heard that with maturity the power
to change increases, he decided once again to give up smoking.
He was thirty-eight and decided that he could do it.
At a party he told some of his friends that he had quit
smoking. They were very proud of him. That evening,
Christina, a former girlfriend, approached him and they started
talking. She was very impressed with his change. She realized
that when she had felt so attracted to him, his smoking had
been the main reason that she held back from fully embracing
him. Justin and Christina were soul mates, but they didn’t
know it until Justin reached a certain level of maturity.
It was not that smoking made Justin unattractive. What
334 / JOHN GRAY, PH.D.