Mary could wait her whole life and stay single. Knowing that
a partner is right happens only in stage four, the intimacy stage;
it is totally unrealistic to make that a prerequisite. In stage two,
it is perfectly normal to question whether a partner is right for
you.
At a certain point in the uncertainty stage, if you have been
careful not to pursue other relationships, both the man and
woman will be ready to move on to having an exclusive rela-
tionship. Either you become more interested in getting to know
each other or you don’t. Even though you may not be sure, if
a part of you wants to pursue the relationship and if you want
to prepare yourself to know for sure, then it is time to move
on to stage three and have an exclusive relationship.
64 / JOHN GRAY, PH.D.