Chapter 37
Grey Areas on Sex
- Oral Sex
I am fully aware of some Christian opinions that do not approve of oral sex. However, both
as a minister of the Gospel and a medical doctor, I am presenting an opinion which I believe is
both biblically and medically sound. As everyone is entitled to a view, I express this view also
after consultations with other seasoned marriage counsellors, that it can be an exciting and
innovative variant to positive marital sex.
Interestingly enough, wide reading and research have shown that there are several other
Christian ministers, who approve of oral sex. I do therefore affirm that oral sex is one of the grey
areas of sex. I believe that the matter is one of personal preference and taste. It must be agreeable
to both parties in the marriage, as love “seeks not her own”.
In oral sex, the woman receives the male penis into her mouth in order to stimulate the glans
of the penis with her lips and tongue. Also the man may stimulate the woman with his tongue on
her clitoris. Both forms of oral sex can bring an orgasm if prolonged. It is another avenue for
foreplay and it should not replace formal sex. It does not mean ejaculating into the mouth.
(a) Wherever fingers can be used, tongue and lips could also be used. Of course,
cleanliness is a must.
(b) If it is OK to kiss a wife’s lips, nipples, and body, why not her sexual organs
(clitoris and labia minora). Otherwise, we are relegating sexual organs to a “dirty”
category compared to the rest of the body––but our whole body is wonderfully
and perfectly made.
(c) Furthermore, stimulating the clitoris orally is more gentle than if done with
fingers, and there is no lubrication problem. Also, a husband finds it much more
exciting when he uses his mouth to bring his wife to a climax.