Developing Spiritually Mature Temperaments- She must develop her emotional capability to show love and affection;
recognizing that the more she expresses love, the easier it will come. - She must learn forgiveness especially for her father––no woman can fully enjoy
her husband if she harbours hatred or anger toward her father. - Strong-minded, opinionated, often willful choleric wives may vent their
frustration and anger on their husbands and stifle their expressions of love. - A choleric woman may have this problem because she resisted her father’s
affections as a little girl. - Not realizing why she was rejected by her father, the choleric girl may
increasingly withdraw from her father and refuse to show any normal
expressions of emotion toward her father. This will encourage a growing
resentment toward men. - She must avoid heaping sarcasm, criticism and ridicule on her husband in the area
of sex. - Cholerics exude such self-confidence that without saying anything, people
naturally feel inadequate. The choleric wife therefore needs to let her husband
know how much she values him as a man and a lover––she must express
appreciation for the masculinity of her man.
How to Be a Spiritually Mature Melancholic Husband or Wife
- Lower your standards––we live in an imperfect world where things don’t always
turn out as you plan. Learn to accept imperfection from yourself and especially
from your wife and children. This will liberate you from the bondage of
perfectionism. - Cultivate a heart of grace and mercy; consider the beam in your own eye when
you get absorbed by the speck of others. - Develop your sense of humour.
- Make a conscious effort to overcome depression. That is:
i. Meditate on God’s Word and pray daily (Psalm 119:27-28).
ii. Count your blessings (1 Thessalonians 5:18).
iii. Ponder on truths about who you are in Christ and believe them (Romans 8:17).
iv. Set yourself free––make a conscious effort to forgive those who have
offended you. Forgiving doesn’t make them right but it sets you free
(Matthew 6:12-15).
v. Stop, and look for the silver lining in the gray cloud––choose to focus your
attention on what’s right in the world rather than what’s wrong
(Philppians 4:6-8).
vi. Realize that depression is frequently biochemical; seek medication if you
have to.