13 THE ‘AS IF’ PRINCIPLE
Assume a virtue if you have it not.
William Shakespeare
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In your notebook describe how you would behave and what you would
do if you were confident.
Now do it. Behave that way.
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People can be full of confidence on the outsidebut plagued with self-
doubtinside. Make a list of well-known people, alive or deceased, who
seem, or seemed, confident, but admitted to lacking confidence. Add
anyone you know, or knew, personally. How did they conceal their lack
of confidence? What did they doto appear confident? If you’re not sure,
try to find out.
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Use the Modelling technique. Modelling is based on the common sense
notion that you can avoid a great deal of struggle and inconvenience by
finding someone who is already confident, and learning from them.
Start by making a list of people you know, have heard of, read about
or seen in films and on TV, whom you admire and would like to
emulate. They could be, for instance, the most popular people at work
or school, historical figures, or even fictional characters.
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Pick two or three models from your list in Confidence Builder 87,
and find out as much as you can about them. If you know them
personally, quietly observe them; if not, read about them, hire films or
videos and put yourself in their shoes. Imagine what it must be like to
bethese people.
Which of their qualities do you already possess? Which do you lack?
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