Acontinuationof thisconversationopensthe doorforcriticismsand
turns the house into a battlefield in which the couple insults andde-
gradeseachother.If theylivelikethis,theywouldnotenjoytheirlives
everagain,becauseahousedevoidoffamilyloveandsincerity,isnota
place of comfort.
Moreover,amanwhoregardshimselfasunluckyandhismarriageas
a failure, and a woman who is constantly being humiliated, are both
pronetomentaldisorders andotherillnesses.Ifthe magnitudeoftheir
rowbecomeslargerthenthereisalwaysthedangerofdivorceandsepar-
ation.Adivorceisnotveryhelpfultoeitherpartyespeciallyifthereare
children in the family.
Society does not havemuch respect for a divorcee. Moreover, a di-
vorcewould inflicteconomiclosses onaman, whichare not easilyre-
pairable.Thisisespeciallytrueifhewantstore-marry,sincehewould
alsohavetospendmoneyonhissecondmarriage.Furthermore,itisnot
atallclearthatadivorceeisabletofindanotherwomanwhowouldlive
up to his expectations.
Re-marriage would not be easy for him because of his past record.
Even if he finds another woman, she would definitely possesscertain
faults also. She may even turnout to be worse than his first wife. He
would then have to cope with her. This is becausesome men are too
proudtoconfesstheirshortcomings.Itisraretofindamanwhoisfully
satisfiedwithhissecondmarriage.Ithasevenbeenseenthatsomemen
return to their first wives.
DearSir!Whyshouldyoulookatyourwifewithaviewoffindingher
faultsandwhydoyouplacesomuchImportanceonhertrivialdefects?
Whydoyoumagnifyherdeficienciessomuchsothatitcausessuffering
foryouandyourfamily?Haveyoueverseenaperfectwoman?Areyou
perfectyourself?Whatare trivialdeficienciesworththat youendanger
your marriage for their sake?
Becertain that ifyoulookatyour wife witha logicalandfair view,
youwouldseemany goodpointsabouther.You lookandsee thather
merits would outweigh her deficiencies.Islam regards this attitude as
harmfulanddistastefulandthusforbidsallfromfindingotherpeople's
faults.