Chapter 54

The Disciplinary Rights of the Husband

Althoughahusbandandwife,whoformajointfamilylife,shareandco-
operate in running the affairs of their house, they may have different
opinionsovercertainmatters.Amanmightfeelthatitshouldbehewho
should decideabout family affairs, with his wife's indisputable agree-
ment.At thesame timehis wifemayobject toher roleastheobedient
party.Argumentsandrowsmaythenstartbecausebothpartiesattempt
to establish their authorityover the other. The bestsolution to sucha
problemisthatbothshouldtrytorefrainfromactingassuperiortothe
other,andtrytoresolvetheirproblemsthroughdialogueanddeepun-
derstanding. This would only be feasible if both of them stop being
stubborn.

Somemen order theirwives to do many thingsandfare confronted
withresistance,theythinkitrighttobecomeannoyed,topunishoreven
to physicallyhurt their wives. Thisapproach is not correct atall. The
menof the'Ageof Ignorance',who tackedhumanity,usedtohurtand
beattheirwives."ThereveredProphet (SA)bannedthe beatingofwo-
men,unless in special circumstances whenpunishment becomes wajib
(obligatory).""TheProphet (SA)also stated:'Iam astonishedata man
whobeatshiswife,whereasitishehimself,morethanhiswife,whode-
servesabeating. 0 people.donotbeatyourwomenwith sticksbecause
such an act has Qisas (reprisal).''

Oppressing awoman who has wishfullymarried her husband, who
seekscomfortandtranquillitywith him,andwhoexpectsherhusband
tosharewithherproblems,isnotright.InfactAllahentrustsawoman
to her husband through marriage and a man's mistreatment with his
wife would be unfaithfulness towards Allah's trust in him.