Chapter 67

The Major Obstacle in Settling down Disagreements

Thebiggestobstacleinsolvingfamilyrowsareself-centrednessandself-
conceit.Unfortunately,manypeopleareaffectedbythesecharacteristics.
Suchpeoplelackacertainintelligencewherebythey onlyacknowledge
theirownvirtueswhiledismissingthoseofothersandneverowntheir
failures.Iiisespeciallydisastrouswhenthisdisorderofcharacterisac-
complished by another, namely. picking up faults with others. Some-
timesboth husbandand wifesuffer with the latter in which casethey
mayhavearowdayandnight.Eachonecriticisestile otherwhilefree-
ing themselves totally from faults.

Sometimes ifonly one side suffers from this defect of faultfinding.
theywouldpickupitupwiththeotherandbySomewayliberatethem-
selves completely from all criticisms.

Wherebothhusbandandwifesufferwiththisdisorder,itisparticu-
larlydifficulttoreconcilethem,becausetheywouldnotbe preparedto
takeanyone’s advice. Wheneach one listens to the radioor watchesa
programmeontelevisionpertainingtofamilyaffairs,theywouldnotice
aparticular lowof character whichexistedin their partnerandwould
throwitin theirfaces.Butanytalked-aboutfaultpertaining tothem-
selves would evadetheir attention.They would buy a bookonfamily
moralsandhand itoverto theirpartner, without feelingany need for
themselves to read it.

Selfishnesscanbecomesoseverethattheaffectedpersoncannoteven
be awareofit. Insuchasituation,the relationship betweenthe couple
becomesstrainedandevenimpossibletocontinue.Consequently,either
lifewouldgoonintheformofrows,distress,andunhappiness,ormay
even lead to a divorce.