Itis,therefore,recommendedtoallcouplestoabstainfromselfishness
andself-conceit.Acouple,who aretroubledwiththissituation,should
findtimetosittogetherandliketwohonestjudgestalkabouttheirprob-
lem(s). They should listen to each other without prejudice. Each one
shouldtake anote of hisown shortcomings withoutoverlooking even
thesmallestIssue,andwiththeintentionofcorrectingthem.Thenthey
shouldbothdecidetocorrectthemselves;butonlyiftheyfeeltheneces-
sity for deep understanding and wherethey both longto revivetheir
love and tranquillity which once existed between them.
However, in the case of an inability to achieve reconciliation, they
should refer their problem(s) to an experienced, faithful, aware. trust-
worthy,andbenevolentperson.Ifsuchapersonisafriendorarelative,
itmaybe totheiradvantagebecausethey cantellthemeverythingand
awaittheirverdict.Theyshouldlistentohimandtakenoteofhisadvice
givenandintendtoputitintopractice.Ofcoursebeingfaithfultothere-
commendations ofajudge isnot easy,butaperson,who is concerned
abouthisfamilyanditsstability,peace,andsurvival, shouldpersevere
and later enjoy its valuable results.
Parentsofsuchcouples,ifawareoftheirchildren'sfamilyproblem(s),
shouldadvisethemtocallonanexperienced, faithful,andgoodinten-
tionedjudge.Parentsshouldnottakesideswitheitherhusbandorwife.
Inthisway,withthehelpofAllahtheirproblemswouldberesolved.Al-
lah states in the Holy Qur'an:
"Andifyoufearabreachbetweenthetwo,thenappointajudgefrom
hispeopleandajudgefromher people;ifthey bothdesireagreement,
Al/ah will effect harmony between them; surely Allah is Knowing,
Aware (4:35)."