Principles of Marriage and Family Ethics

(Chris Devlin) #1

Itisapitythatsomewomenareignorantandobstinateintheirignor-
ance.It ispossiblethat theymay shatter theirfamily lifeoveratrivial
matter. The following are some illustrative cases of such women:


"Awomanleftherhusbandandwenttoherfather'shousebecauseher
husbandhadbadbreath.Shewasnotpreparedtogobackhomeuntilhe
correctedhisproblem.Onthebasisofthehusband'scomplaint,thecourt
reconciled the couple andthe wife returned to him. When the couple
wenthome,thewifecouldstillsmellhisbadbreathsoshewentintoan-
other room. The husband went crazy and killed her'."
"A femaledentist divorced her husband becausehe was not on the
same level as her; he had graduated three years after her'."
'Awomanapplied fora divorcebecauseher husbandusedto siton
the floorand eatwith hisfingers, did notshaveeveryday anddidnot
know how to socialise with others'.


Ofcourseallwomenarenotlikethis.Therearethosewhoareintelli-
gent,realistic, andaware enoughthat they do not foolishly jeopardise
theirmarriageandhappinessbyexaggeratingtheshortcomingsoftheir
husbands.


DearMadam!Yourhusbandisahumanbeinglikeyou.Heisnotper-
fect,buthe mayhave manymerits. Ifyou are Interestedin your mar-
riageandyourfamilythendonotsetouttofindhisweaknesses.Donot
regardhissmalldefectsasimportant.Donotcomparehimwithanideal
man whom you have established in your mind. There may be some
faults with your husband which are not present in others. But you
shouldrememberthatothermenmayhaveotherdefectswhicharenon-
existentinyours.Besatisfiedwithhismerits.Youwillconsequentlysee
thathismeritsoutweighhisfaults.Besideswhyshouldyouexpectaper-
fecthusbandwhenyouareimperfectyourself.Ifyouareproudenough
to think you are perfect, then ask others.


"TheProphet(SA)ofAllahstated:'Thereisnothingworseforhuman
beings than to seek the faults of others. while ignoring their own flaws'."


Why shouldyou exaggerate atrivial fault? Why shouldyou shatter
your life forthe sake of something unimportant? Be wise?Stop being
frivolous! Ignorethe faults and do not mention themin front of your

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