she looks TOO good... she probably spends a lot of time tending to her looks,
which means she won't be a very attentive partner and parent... I choose not
to feel attracted to her."
And then we all woke up!
And back to reality...
As you‘re going to hear me say a lot, men are attracted more to looks, and
women are ATTRACTED more to personality, style, and communication. Sure,
Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise are handsome in a way that turns women on, but
these guys aren't the RULE, they're the exception.
Men are attracted to hot-looking young women, and women are attracted
to a special combination of confidence, humor, and personality.
The fact is that women's attention is captured by the type of character
usually found in romance novels because these men offer something that
satisfies a DEEPER need. And this deeper need is both emotional and complex.
If you run down to the bookstore or go online and pick up some of these
romance novels, you'll find something interesting... the stories usually start
with a male character that is wild, often abusive, untamed, and generally a
not-very-nice kind of guy (Sure, by the end of the book he's usually calmed
down a bit, but you always know who he REALLY is underneath).
I'm sure you've either experienced or seen the situation where a guy says,
"For some reason the women I know date these jerks, then I'm the 'friend'
that gets to hear about it." Why is it that women date jerks, then tell their
"nice guy" friends the stories instead of just dating the nice guys in the first
place?
ATTRACTION. ATTRACTION. ATTRACTION!
An Exercise To Help You Start Thinking Differently
I have a simple exercise that I'd like you to try right now:
Take your computer mouse and turn it 180 degrees clockwise. Turn it so
the end that is usually closest to you is now furthest from you, and the
furthest part is closest. (If it has a cord, the cord and buttons will be under
your palm
now.)
Now try to use the mouse to move the pointer around on your screen.
At first, it doesn't make any sense... it's backwards and upside down. But
as you play with it a bit, you start to get used to it, and you can move around
pretty quickly.