we don‘t think we‘re physically attractive enough, instead of remembering that
our personality, which is something that we can control, is what counts.
If you don‘t consider yourself physically attractive enough, you probably
won‘t approach women. But the fact is I know some remarkably unattractive
men who are extremely successful when approaching women. Form a new
self-image with an attractive personality and then you can attain the same
level of success as these people, regardless of your looks.
Stop thinking your looks are a limitation. Make the best of them and
remember your personality can outweigh any flaws in physical appearance.
We‘re back to a key belief about ourselves: we can be very attractive to
women, no matter what our flaws, as long as we discover our
attractive personality.
Elusive Obvious: What They Actually Want Is Already In You
If looks aren‘t what matters and even though men everywhere puzzle
about their lack of success with women, perhaps the answer is right in front of
us but we just don‘t see it. At some instinctual level we must possess the
manly personality that attracted women for the entire history of our evolution.
I think we already have a part deep inside us which knows how to be very
attractive, but we just haven‘t activated it yet. It‘s certainly present in all the
hero icons, like James Bond, that women swoon for. If we haven‘t forgotten it,
then why can‘t we tap into it?
We are too smart for our own good and have allowed social conditioning to
override the instinctual strong man with the thoughtful, sensitive man—so
sensitive he is afraid to approach women, afraid to bust on them, and afraid to
demand that they live up to their potential for him. All of which they‘d find
attractive and would result in more satisfying relationships for both sexes.
Women aren't attracted to jerks because they like abuse - it's because they
like something else - and it just so happens that jerks and bad boys tend to
possess these other attractive qualities. You can learn to develop these other
qualities without the abuse and attract women the way jerks do without being
a jerk. Don't be a wuss or her little boy—be the MAN her unconscious wants.
REMEMBER... It‘s OK to Be a Man
Being a man and having manly drives is not only fine, it‘s natural. Yet a lot
of men feel guilty for these drives and try to suppress them. Reframe this
thought in your mind and realize that there‘s nothing wrong with those drives.
It‘s how you act on them that counts. As long as you‘re not forcing anything
on anyone, there‘s nothing wrong with assuming a dominant role and letting
others follow if they want.