The first was a man finely dressed, bespectacled, who possessed
an air of self-importance. The second was a lady, somewhat plain,
but neat in appearance, who possessed an air of humility.
The clerk addressed her first, “May I help you?”
Before she could respond, the man promptly cut her off.
“Excuse me,” he informed the clerk with perfect enunciation, “I
believe I was here first, and I’m in quite a hurry.”
The woman said, “That’s fine,” and politely stepped back.
Irritated, the clerk said to the woman, “That’s OK, I’m sure I
can help you in short order.”
The clerk then turned to the man and crisply stated, “I’ll be
right with you.”—The Daily DoseThe story reminds me of the observation made by Justice Clarence
Thomas, “Good manners will open doors that the best education cannot.”
Those who have gathered knowledge and credentials to the degree
that they now believe they are above the laws of common courtesy have
fallen prey to extreme stupidity.
People are more impressed with kindness than with knowledge. Doors
open quickly—not to those impressed with themselves, but to those im-
pressed with the importance of others.
How often have you seen an individual who has gathered knowledge,
wealth, degrees, or credentials until they believe they are above the laws of
common courtesy? These people have fallen prey to extreme emotional
stupidity. They are ignoring the first commandment of EQ—treat every per-
son you meet with courtesy and respect.
One day, as I was opening the door to the local mall with my teenage
son, a rough, rather threatening looking young man walked up behind us.
He was the kind of kid people would avoid—one who wore his animosity
on his sleeve. I decided to open the door for him and greet him like I
would any other person. He walked through the door with a stunned look
on his face and looked at me in a way as if to say, “You’re opening the door
for me?” He choked out a “Thanks,” and walked by us. Upon seeing his re-
sponse, I suspected that no one had ever opened a door for him.
Treating the powerful and influential with courtesy and respect is com-
mon but often done only to obtain favor. It is uncommon to treat every per-
son with VIP status, especially those gatekeepers who stand between you
and the people you hope to do business with. In building rapport, the emo-
tionally intelligent sales professional never underestimates the goodwill that
comes from paying small courtesies to those who society would label “small
players.”
Many sales professionals become so intensely focused on the tasks at
hand and their business goals that they neglect these small courtesies.
206 SELLING WITH EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE