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The Principles of Emotional Intelligence- Confrontations do not need to be confrontational to be effective.
- Those who desire to fix the blame will have trouble fixing the problem.
- If people like your manner, they are more willing to help solve your
problems.
When most people think of the word confrontation, they immediately as-
sociate it with negative emotions and the escalation of conflict. Yet con-
frontation, when handled properly, can be a positive emotional process
that results not only in resolving the conflict but in preventing future con-
flicts as well. Your most crucial step is your first step—the approach.
I recently heard a story about a business owner who had an irate con-
tractor pacing in his reception area. He fit the stereotype for his trade—a
stout, muscular man with a stern demeanor that advertised the brevity of his
patience. He told the receptionist that the business owner owed him $30,000
and he wasn’t leaving the building until he had a check in hand. His tone
was harsh enough that the receptionist figured he meant to become a per-
manent reception area fixture if not satisfied with payment. She called the
business owner’s office to apprise him of the situation. To her surprise and
to the surprise of the contractor, he said, “Oh, send him right in.”
REDUCING STRESS IN
CONFRONTATION
“All problems become smaller if you don’t dodge them but
confront them. Touch a thistle timidly, and it pricks
you; grasp it boldly, and its spines crumble.”
—WILLIAM F. HALSEY