Awareness of our own personality’s impact and greater concern for the
comfort level of our clients is the bedrock for success in communication.
These two objectives, when realized, will minimize miscommunication, mis-
understanding, and negative interaction with clients and serve as a basis for
strengthened trust and improved relationships. This course, for many, has
become a foundational communication skill for managing client expecta-
tions, reactions, and behaviors. Moving from me to we means we put our
clients first by understanding each client and the manner in which she
wishes to be approached.
THE TEAM DYNAMIC
Years ago, I participated in the Meyer–Briggs personality profile study.
After the course, when I was asked to explain “what I was,” I had difficulty
articulating what I had learned. The information, I felt, was brilliant but
needed simplification. I began to search out other systems that were sim-
pler in their terminology. Each system I reviewed had one flaw that both-
ered me—they were all egocentric in their approach.
These systems basically answered one question, namely “Who am I?”, as
if that was the end of the discussion. It was for this reason that I decided to
create a new system called TEAM Dynamics. I designed this system to ex-
plore the quadrant personality theory from a broader perspective that an-
swers all the following questions:
- What is my style?
•What is your style, and how do I recognize it? - What dynamic is created when our two personalities interact, and
how can I leave a positive emotional impression?
By moving beyond the egocentric focus, we find many applications for
this study of the dynamics of personality. The emotionally intelligent sales
professional will quickly integrate this knowledge of self and personality dy-
namics into his approach with each client.
This theme will be revisited later in this book under different contexts.
In Chapter 19, “Shifting Gears—Four Critical Selling Adjustments,” I reveal
the body language signals that indicate personality style and the specific ad-
justments you need to make when you see these signals. In Chapter 25,
“Masters in Conflict,” I explore the topic of how to manage tension and
conflict that is based on clashing personalities.
12 SELLING WITH EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE