The Principles of Emotional Intelligence
- Each personality possesses predictable behaviors in conflict scenarios.
- Knowing how to temper one’s own biases and impulses prevents the
escalation of conflict. - An emotionally intelligent response acts as a catalyst for reversing a
negative conversational climate.
Most of us would agree that much of the conflict we experience with
clients, employees, and coworkers is personality based, hence the term per-
sonality clash. In this chapter, I reveal effective conflict approaches that re-
duce the clash dynamic by building an emotional bridge, giving the other
party safety and comfort. I also highlight the personality biases that tend to
surface in conflict scenarios and explain how to keep these biases from sab-
otaging the resolution process. Very specific compromises are effective for
diffusing or preventing conflicts with each personality type. Finally, I discuss
how to stay above the fray when encountering the surly, the arrogant, the de-
fensive, and the many other negative approaches we are bound to run into.
THE POWER OF EMPATHY
The first and most crucial emotional competence necessary for resolv-
ing conflict is empathy—the process of identifying emotionally with another
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MASTERS IN CONFLICT
“Persuasion, kind, unassuming persuasion should
be adapted to influence the conduct of men.”
—ABRAHAM LINCOLN