Selling With Emotional Intelligence : 5 Skills For Building Stronger Client Relationships

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sonality DNA—a psychological blueprint that directs temperament and be-
havior. This personality DNA plays a leading role in determining the types
of people and processes we are uncomfortable with. Once we come to an
awareness of our own personality DNA, we realize why we instantly click
with some personalities and clash with others. We also realize why some
processes drive us crazy, while we seem to revel in others.
The fact that our personality is blueprinted does not mean that we can-
not adjust our behavior, communication, and responses. In fact, becoming
aware of our personality DNA makes it easier for us to recognize where we
need to adjust. We need to throttle back certain aspects of our personality
when we are around certain types of clients, because those features will rub
them the wrong way. With clients who match our own personality style,
however, we need to let those particular features of our personality shine.
Awareness is needed in three specific areas.



  1. Who we are

  2. Who our clients are

  3. The adjustments we need to make in our communication to build
    better connections


Success comes when we are aware enough to recognize how our per-
sonality plays out to others and know how to temper the features of our
personality in given situations.
Emotionally intelligent individuals are highly cognizant of their unique
personality challenges and inherent relational liabilities. In relationship
building, this personal awareness is 80 percent of the battle. Many people
keep making the same relational errors over and over and just don’t seem
to get it. On the other hand, being aware of your personality DNA will pay
rich dividends, because it will help you play to your strengths, avoid your li-
abilities, and focus on the areas in which you can improve. Following is
such an agenda for each personality style.


THE TOGETHERNESS PERSONALITY


Strengths


The Togetherness personality (see Figure 3.1) has a feeling-oriented
mode of relating. They are always striving to keep consensus, harmony, and
teamwork. When conflicts arise, they are likely to play the peacemaker’s
role by saying, “Let’s please try to get along.”


Understanding Your Personality DNA 23
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