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“How can I change my husband?” Or, “How can I change
my wife?” Or, “How can I change my teenager?”
People who take the seminars on self-motivation, at
some point during the workshop, agree completely with
the principles and ideas. Then, they start to think about
the people who don’t buy in. In the question-and-answer
period, their questions are about those poor people. How
do we change them? I always quote Gandhi. Be the
change you wish to see in others.
Bybeing what you want them to be, you lead by in-
spiration. Nobody really wants to be taught by lectures
and advice. They want to be led through inspiration.
Sales managers often ask me how they can get a cer-
tain salesperson to do more self-motivated activities. I
tell them that they have to be the salesperson they want
to see. Take them on a call, I say, and let them watch
you. Don’t tell them how to do it, inspire them to do it.
I once attended a concert given by my daughter’s
fourth-grade chorus, which sang a song called “Let There
Be Peace on Earth.” The song’s words went, “Let there
be peace on earth, and let it begin with me....” I beamed
when I heard it. It was such a beautiful expression of
being the change—a celebration of self-responsibility
that rarely is portrayed in young people’s lives today.
What you tell people to do often goes right by them.
Who you are does not.
81. Pin your life down
Car dealer extraordinaire Henry Brown once told
me a story about his son, a high school wrestler. His
boy had been getting only fair results as a wrestler that
year and when Henry talked to him about it he learned
the reason.