Most aristocratic marriages in the Middle Ages were made chiefly for
the dowry of feudal lands the wife would bring to the union. Often a knight
simply married a fief, and his wife came as an encumbrance. She entered
into his life as a household helper and childbearer, rarely as a romantic
lover. Medieval poets wrote that the true love of a knight must not be his
wife, or even a damsel he might have wedded for love. Such marriages were
incompatible with true chivalric love. A knight’s chosen lady could be an-
other noblewoman, married or not. When a knight had chosen his lover-
to-be, he wrote her amorous letters and promised to prove his constant de-
votion by performing valorous deeds. Once they had given their hearts to
each other, they pledged that their love would forever remain secret, and he
swore that he would serve her for all his days, no matter what her com-
mands might be. He was expected to compose songs and poems to extol
her virtues, and it was fitting for him to sigh for his lady and suffer the pain
of love’s melancholy heartache.
Chivalry’s demand that the suitor remain gallant in all things some-
times unfairly challenged a knight when his frivolous lady commanded him
to perform extravagant feats to prove his love for her. According to the po-
ets, Queen Guinevere, faithless wife of King Arthur, ordered Lancelot to
undergo a round of ordeals before she surrendered to him in their adulter-
ous love affair. Yet, the central theme of such unchaste love remained
firm—a knight must perform heroic deeds for his lady.
The theme of chivalric love emerged in the poetry of the troubadours
of southern France, who sang their voluptuous verses in the Provençal
tongue. Then came the romantic minstrels of northern France, the trou-
vères, and the minnesingers of Germany, whose balladry carried on the
same harmonious motif. The love theme that wanders through the tales of
medieval knighthood and its chivalric code was enriched by the grande
dame, Eleanor of Aquitaine. Married first to Louis VII of France, then to
Henry II of England, she brought the songs of the troubadours into the
royal court. Later, at Poitiers, she organized the first love court, where the
code of courtly romance was woven into the military discipline of knightly
chivalry and where an assembly of noblewoman settled quarrels between
lovers and judged which gallant knight had loved the best. The proceedings
of such courts were frivolous and artificial. Ideally, the knightly lover was
expected to keep some distance from his lady, knowing that his love must
remain hopeless. In truth, the lover’s muted yearnings were not always un-
heard or unrewarded, and adultery often became an emotional release for
many noblewomen hopelessly caught in a loveless marriage of convenience.
The rules for lovemaking among the nobility were set down in an ir-
reverent manual by Andreas Capellanus, De Arte Honeste Amandi(Latin;
On the Art of Loving Honestly). It became a guide for knightly romance80 Chivalry