- The Prouds 224
disposition dictates that one loves his brother and favors
him to himself. If one needs help to achieve what is good
for him, his brothers, in natural circumstances, will be the
first persons he resorts to, to achieve it. Yet, most people
act contrary to this disposition.
“If you ask most people who their family is, most
people would say that they are those who are related to
them by blood and kinship.
“But if you ask me who my family is, I would say
that they are those whom you keep in touch with, no matter
how bad they may be. Family members are more capable of
making a man happy than anyone else. Yet, they can also
make him miserable. The harshest ugliest blows are those
inflicted by family members and brothers!
“If a man with whom you trade or work for harms
you, you would end such trade and quit such a job.
“But if your brother, who shares most things with
you including your father, mother, siblings, relatives,
house, and inheritance and may even share your looks,
hurts you, you could not end your relationship with him
easily.
“If a distant person harms you, returning the harm
would not hurt you. But if a relative harms you, it would be
very difficult to return the harm, and you would think a
thousand times before you do so.
“In general, a friend is better than a brother
although many people might find it hard to accept and
admit this. That is because one chooses his friend willingly,
whereas a brother is determined by God, whether one likes
him or not. One would not accept someone else’s
friendship if it did not please him, which makes the two
sides compatible and increases the chances for finding