Friendship

(C. Jardin) #1

Maybe then we could stop killing each other. Maybe then we could stop hating each other.
Maybe then we could stop the Kosovos and the Auschwitzs, the endless religious wars in
Ireland, the bitter racial strife in America, the ethnic and class and cultural prejudices around
the world, which lead to so much cruelty and suffering.


Maybe then you could.


Maybe then we could ensure that there would never again be a Matthew Shepard, beaten
unmercifully and left to die, tied to a cattle fence in Wyoming, because he was gay.
Can’t You say something about gay people? I have been asked over and over again, at
lectures and appearances and retreats all over the world: Won’t You say something to end,
once and for all, the violence and cruelty and discrimination against gay men and women?
So much of it is done in Your name. So much of it is said to be justified by Your teaching, and
Your law.


I have said before, and I will say again: There is no form and there is no manner in which the
expression of love that is pure and true is inappropriate.


I cannot be more unequivocal than that.


But how do You define love which is pure and true?


It seeks to damage or hurt no one. It seeks to avoid the possibility of damage or hurt to
anyone.


How can we hope to know if someone else might possibly be hurt by an expression of love?


You may not be able to know in every case. And when you cannot know, you cannot know.
Your motives are pure. Your intentions are good. Your love is true.


Yet most times you can know, and most times you do.


It is clear to you at these times how an expression of love could cause another to experience
hurt. At these times, you would do well to ask:


What would love do now?


Not just love for the current object of your affections, but love for all others as well.


But such a “ground rule” could stop us from loving practically everyone! There’s always
someone who can claim that they’ll be hurt by something someone else does in the name of
love.


Yes. Nothing has generated more hurt among your species than the very thing that was
meant to heal it.


Why is that?


You do not understand what love is.

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