Healing After Loss

(coco) #1

MAY 2


Anyone who tells a story speaks a world into being.
—MICHAEL WILLIAMS

One of the customs we have seen develop at memorial ser-
vices is to have friends and loved ones share stories about
the one who has died—tender moments, jokes, and anec-
dotes of their life together. These bring their own joy and
serve to lighten the sadness of loss.
We have done the same thing in a less formal setting when
after the services are over, family and friends gather for re-
freshment and find themselves lapsing into fond reminis-
cence—stories from recent times or from long ago.
I recall returning home from the cemetery after my father’s
death and how family and friends assembled to share food
and conversation. After a while someone said, “Wouldn’t
George have enjoyed this party!” and someone else said,
“Perhaps he’s enjoying it now.” Surely all of us felt his
spirit among us.
Especially if death has come under particularly hard cir-
cumstances, as in the death of a child, friends may think it
an act of kindness to refrain from mentioning the child. All
the more reason to “speak into being” a life that has ended
so soon. Because a life is over doesn’t mean that that life
won’t continue to enrich and bless the living.


Shared stories are a gift to the teller and to the one who hears.

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