SEPTEMBER 25
It was coming to John that when the great people in one’s
life die, one is forced to be more oneself. One is forced to
grow up.
—MAY SARTONA young woman mourning the death of her father said that
when she accepted that death was all right, she found
within herself a whole new well of energy from which to
draw in developing her own life.
We may resist such a notion. To ascribe any “benefits” to
our loss might imply a diminishment not only of our own
sense of loss, but also of the importance of the person we
love. If we can get along well without him or her, does it
mean the person wasn’t as crucial to our life as we had
thought?
Not at all. The new energy available to us was formed
and nourished in the richness of our relationship with that
person. The self that we are will carry our loved one’s im-
print forever. We have not abandoned him or her any more
than he or she has abandoned us. If we find in ourselves a
new maturity, that is part of the person’s legacy to us, and
he or she would wish us godspeed. But we must be willing
to let it happen.
I will carry with me forever the strength my loved one bequeathed
to me.